OBAMA APPROVAL ON THE LOW – – – Following a run of bad news bears, President Obama’s approval rating is down to 43 percent again, the New York Times reports. You know what that means…To ESPN we go, Batman!
CHELSEA FOR PRESIDENT? – – – As we’re all hung up on 2016 in 2013, Bill Clinton is looking toward 2020, 2024 and maybe 2028 (I’ve got dibs on 2032) by saying his daughter, Chelsea, would make a great president.
C STUDENTS – – – Americans are C students when it comes to our diet habits. Hey, we like big cheeseburgers and we cannot lie. And sugar. And flour. And all that other delicious but horrible for you stuff. Yummmmmmy!
WHY ARE YOU WEARING PAJAMAS? – – – The new Amazon Kindle comes with a new feature. You can now dial up tech support for all your mundane user questions and…wait for it…see them live and in person on your screen. Ummm…Mr. Tech Support Man…why are you wearing pajamas?
TO THE MOON! – – – The cost of first class U.S. Postage stamps is set for yet another increase, to 49 cents a licker in January. How much for coach?
THE 15 PERCENT – – – Fifteen percent of our fellow Americans do not – repeat do not – use the Internets for reasons that include cost, accessibility, etc. How are they supposed to watch adorable cat videos then?! CONGRESS MUST CONVENE A PANEL IMMEDIATELY!
IN BOBBLEHEADS WE TRUST – – – Want to control the mind of your friends and adversaries alike? Tempt them with bobbleheads. It works for Major League Baseball.
THE OLYMPIC TORCH GOES TO SPACE – – – Two Russians and an American enter a space capsule…and blast off to the International Space Station with the Olympic torch in tow!